{"id":382,"date":"2013-04-07T15:01:45","date_gmt":"2013-04-07T19:01:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/?p=382"},"modified":"2013-04-07T15:14:43","modified_gmt":"2013-04-07T19:14:43","slug":"vulnerability-reframing-a-scarcity-mindset","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/?p=382","title":{"rendered":"Vulnerability: Reframing a Scarcity Mindset"},"content":{"rendered":"

I recently began reading the latest book, and now a best seller, by research professor and \"imagesCAVLCCEZ\"<\/a>sociologist, Brene\u2019 Brown, \u201cDaring Greatly.\u201d\u00a0 The book title comes from Theodore Roosevelt\u2019s speech, \u201cCitizenship in a Republic\u201d delivered in Paris on April 23, 1910.\u00a0 The line referenced says, \u201c\u2026there is no effort without error and shortcoming\u2026if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly.\u201d\u00a0 Dr. Brown says in her introduction that this quote spoke what she had been researching for a decade and that is, vulnerability.\u00a0 She states,\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/span>\u201cVulnerability is not knowing victory or defeat, its understanding the necessity of both; it\u2019s engaging.\u00a0 It\u2019s being all in.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/i>She goes on to explain, <\/span><\/span><\/span>\u201cVulnerability is not weakness, and the uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure we face everyday are not optional.\u00a0 Our only choice is a question of engagement.\u201d<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/i>Her latest book looks at why we fear vulnerability, how we protect ourselves from it, what price we pay for that protection, and how we can own and engage with vulnerability in order to change how we live, love, parent, and lead.\u00a0 She looks at the \u201cwhy we fear vulnerability\u201d by examining the concept of scarcity.\u00a0 She sees a culture of scarcity at play.\u00a0 It is the \u201cnever enough\u201d mindset.\u00a0 Never good enough.\u00a0 Never perfect enough.\u00a0 Never thin enough.\u00a0 Never wealthy enough.\u00a0 Never safe enough.\u00a0 Lynne Twist in her book, \u201cThe Soul of Money,\u201d writes, <\/span>\u201cOur first waking thought of the day is, \u2018I didn\u2019t get enough sleep.\u2019 Then, \u2018I don\u2019t have enough time.\u2019\u00a0 She says, \u201cWe will spend most of our lives hearing, explaining, complaining, or worrying about what we don\u2019t have enough of.\u00a0 Before we even sit up in bed\u2026we\u2019re already behind, already losing, already lacking something.\u00a0 We go to sleep burdened by those these thoughts.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Worrying about scarcity doesn\u2019t pull us together for healing (which requires vulnerability).\u00a0 Worrying about scarcity creates anger, fear, shame, and disengagement.\u00a0 Being afraid and negative is second nature.\u00a0 We find this in the family, work, school, and community.\u00a0 Rather than taking vulnerable risks to find solutions and challenge the climate of scarcity we blame and find fault. Brown believes that the opposite of scarcity is not \u201cabundance.\u201d\u00a0 Instead, the opposite of scarcity \u00a0is \u201cenough\u201d or \u201cwholeheartedness.\u201d\u00a0 She states, \u201cThe core of this is vulnerability and worthiness:\u00a0 facing uncertainty, exposure, and emotional risk and knowing I am enough.\u201d\u00a0 It is not about being perfect or extraordinary.\u00a0 It is about being enough and worthy.\u00a0 It is about having enough and embracing that.<\/span><\/p>\n

When I reflect on this condition of negativity which focuses on what is lacking both in ourselves and the community, I am reminded of a personal discipline that many people have found enriching; a gratitude journal.\u00a0 It is a very simple activity in which every evening before bedtime you write three things for which you are grateful.\u00a0 They can be elaborate or simple. The activity allows you to redirect thoughts and perspectives to a more positive framework; to be mindful of the positives and the concept that there is \u201cenough.\u201d A similar activity is a gratitude jar.\u00a0 There are various approaches and websites for this activity.\u00a0 Basically, everyday throughout the year you write a gratitude and place it in the jar.\u00a0 On days when you are struggling, you can pull a gratitude out of the jar and be encouraged.\u00a0\u00a0Writing gratitudes disciplines us to look beyond scarcity to what is enough. Acting out of gratitude strengthens us to be vulnerable and to take risks. Being open to gratitude and vulnerability steers us away from the defeating mindset of scarcity.<\/b><\/i><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Be aware of your resistance.\u00a0 It may be your conditioning to old habits and your fear of joy.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>My next article will continue this discussion from \u201cDaring Greatly\u201d and will look at foreboding joy.<\/i><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

There are many websites for gratitude activities.\u00a0 Here are two: \u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>www.thegratitudejar.com<\/span><\/span><\/a>\u00a0\u00a0 A website to share and view others\u2019 gratitudes.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/span>www.sunshineandsippycups.com\/2013\/01\/how-to-create-a-gratitude-journal<\/span><\/span><\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 A creative website that gives prompts for a jar and a journal.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I recently began reading the latest book, and now a best seller, by research professor and sociologist, Brene\u2019 Brown, \u201cDaring Greatly.\u201d\u00a0 The book title comes from Theodore Roosevelt\u2019s speech, \u201cCitizenship in a Republic\u201d delivered in Paris on April 23, 1910.\u00a0 … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-382","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articles"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=382"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":387,"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382\/revisions\/387"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=382"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=382"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.innerperspectivecounseling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=382"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}